Hi friends of the Omschool. Today's topic is loaded and controversial. I'm talking about censorship and why there are reasons for it. Now, if you know me, you know that last thing I am is a book burner. Banning books accomplishes about as much locking up alcohol. It just makes it that much more tempting. I'm not talking about entirely forbidding certain books. I'm saying keep kids from reading books that aren't age-appropriate until they are old enough to understand them. And my reason for saying this is anecdotal.
I started reading about 3 or 4 was reading chapter books by seven and adult literature by about 9. My parents were very involved in their own lives and didn't take any interest in what I read. So I read books that were waaayy to mature for me. I ended up learning about things I was far too young to understand and only ended up feeling icky and confused.
For example, books on intimacy. I read and loved "Are you there God, it's me Margaret" because it actually talked about things like getting your period. So I moved on, at age 9-ish, to "Then Again Maybe I Won't" which talked about a boy's version of puberty. And was totally embarrassed. I totally missed the really good parts of the book because I was stuck on the what seemed to me, gross parts.
Was it wrong for a book geared for 10-14 y/os to talk about male genitalia, wet dreams and self-stimulation? Well, I rest my case for age-appropriate: 13 or 14 maybe, 10, no. My husband said he never read it but would have been horrified even at age 13 or 14. I won't be buying it for my grandsons, either. I'm not a prude but just because I was so off-put reading it too young. Which is sad because the book is a very good read. Maybe it was just the time we lived in, maybe not.
Anyway, then, I bought "Forever" also Judy Blume at 11 and was NOT ready for that AT ALL. It was clearly YA, written about a 17 y/o and was full on teen sex. It made me sick but also luridly fascinated. The problem is not whether teens should read it but that tweens certainly should not. It sent me down the Harlequin romance rabbit hole and by 13, I was reading semi-porn grocery store novels with my stepmom. I still recall how uncomfortable they made me, but hey, when an adult lets you, why not?
Well, why not is because it imprints indelible images on your young mind that leave you feeling dirty and ashamed. But no one tells you this and you don't dare to tell anyone for fear of being told you're disgusting. And if you have been molested, it just makes things worse. You believe it's your fault for reading such things in the first place.
So I don't believe that kids books should sanitize or condescend, there are better times for children, teens and YA to be introduced to various topics. It wasn't just books on sex that were too mature for me. I read the "The Pigman" (Paul Zindel) around 10. I liked it but was also disturbed by it. Same with "Dinky Hocker Shoots Smack." They were good but I just wasn't ready for them. There's arguably no age to read "Helter Skelter" certainly not 13.
Even books like "Freaky Friday" with which there was nothing "iffy" about and which I absolutely adored posed problems when read too young. I missed a lot, it being stream of consciousness writing. And then there were books like "Harriet the Spy" which I read at a younger age but still in range. I missed a lot in that because the setting was unfamiliar. Also, these elementary age kids were featured doing things that were more suited to middle school.
And don't get me started on all the YA psych books I consumed like candy at around 12. "Lisa Bright and Dark" (John Neufield) and "I Never Promised You a Rose Garden" (Joanne Greenberg) gave me a way too young look into mental hospitals, shrinks, manic-depressive disorder, anorexia, depression, schizophrenia, teen suicide, substance abuse, domestic violence, teen pregnancy, homosexuality, and other terrifying but fascinating issues.
Then there were the "teen journal" books I became obsessed with at about 13, such as "Go Ask Alice" "Jay's Journal" and "Annie's Baby." They too dealt with fascinating but frightening things, including Satanism and occult. I just learned, looking them up, that it was all a big con and author Beatrice Sparks was a fake. I really believed she was a psychiatrist and that these were real stories from kids' journals. I majored in psychology because of books like these and even recommended them in past articles. There was a lot of money to be made on teen suffering back then.
In closing, I don't say that these issues should be hushed up. I wish there had been more books on things I was dealing with, like parentification and enmeshment. But then, I probably wouldn't have made the connection anyway because literature was an escape for me. I just urge parents to know what your child is reading and be prepared to walk with them through it.
Our son wanted to take on Stephen King at around 12. I was reluctant but didn't want to make it forbidden fruit. So I powered through a few with him (and found I'm still to young for some of this content!) And we talked about it. And he regrets reading some of it. But maybe that's what maturing is all about, making choices as best you can and living with the consequences of those choices.
Thanks--mar
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